Fixed or Growth Mindset?

Today was the day where I was introduced (not literally) to Carol Dweck and learned a new thing about my children.

I've always been exasperated at the way that as soon as BB is faced with learning a new skill which he does doesn't automatically 'get' then he just switches off, dramatically states that he'll never understand (mostly with tears) and doesn't even try. The dramatics also come at any opportunity that he sees in which he may fail (losing at a game e.g), with him being such a bright kid it is so frustrating as you know that if he just listened and applied himself that he could progress himself and move on. 

Well, tonight I had a 'lightbulb moment' at a Parent Information evening at the school where we watched a lecture by Carol Dweck when I realised that he is a child if Fixed Mindset (as opposed to his little brother who is of Growth Mindset) and a lot of it may come down to the way in which we have been praising both of them. To summarise - BB is often praised on his achievements (well done - you're so clever to have done that!) as most things have come naturally to him and he doesn't really have to try hard in most areas, whereas LL gets praised more on the process. We know he's always had to work at things a bit more as he's been in his brother's shadow (well done -you must have worked so hard to manage that!) and I was oblivious until tonight about the subtle difference between the way the praise has been delivered and the massive impact it has made regarding the way that they approach learning and new challenges. 

One will only attempt something if it guarantees success (Fixed -BB) the other relishes the challenge as they appreciate the reward at the end! (Growth - LL)

The former is actually counter productive as it is slowly limiting the amount of things BB is willing to work at, and completely laughs in the face of the simple 'praise culture' which we've had imposed upon us in the past (positive praise creates confident learners) I now realise that it's not just the praise which important, but the way in which it is delivered!

I'm glad I've learned this while my children are so young, and I can put these tools into use, and hopefully change our Fixed mindset boy into a Growth one and he can reach his full potential :0) 

I'm off to gather together as many articles written by this brilliant woman as I can for some bedtime reading....